# 27 ....Oct. 5, 2003
 

Hi Guys!

How you all doing? Rule of Thumb: If a real friend asks you that, you don't have to say, "Just fine, thanks!". You can be honest and say, "I feel like I fell out of a horse's butt, thank you" and they'll understand.

Hi to all the new people! Question that wakes me up in the middle of the night this week: Why is it when it the days start getting longer in the spring, and it stays lighter out at night in the summer it seems to take sooooo long to get there, but in the fall when it gets dark earlier it seems to happen so fast? There's nothing like sitting around doing something and realizing you're so tired you can't keep your eyes open and man! What a long day it was! You figure it's got to be at least 10 PM but when you look at the clock, it's 7:10 PM and pitch black out already. And don't get me started on how moronic Daylight Saving Time is.

The site was two years old in September! I'm enjoying the hell out of it. Except for going back to look at the older parts of the site and seeing that not only did my $10 Web Page Maker suck (but I miss it), but apparently so did my $50 monitor. It seems a lot of the photos have a lovely green patina tinge to them, or powder blue.. Consider it "artsy" until I get it fixed. Total unique hits to the site in the last year: 10.2 million (Thank You Mike Jackson for those TV specials. I had 4 million hits in 3 days, which sent my web host into apoplexy). Total donations so far this year: $57.50 (thank you thank you!). (Total donations to whatever "Help Me Pay My Bills, I'm A Stupid Bimbo" site that's popular this month: $14,955). Total EMails from my web host provider telling me I can't use 72 GIG of traffic in one week and "What The Hell Kind of Nefarious Code Am I Running Your Package Comes With 35 GB a Month and That's Plenty, Missy, Businesses Don't Even Use That So Fork Over Some More Money For This Bandwidth!" letters: 4. Letters threatening to sue me for... whatever: 4. Death threats: 1. Ranting hate mail: 32. Incredibly nice mail: thousands. Thanks for all and thanks for your company.

Onward!:
MOTHMAN PAY$
Jim Wilson, who is the mayor of Point Pleasant, West Virginia, wasn't quite sure the famous Mothman legend would do much for tourism in his town. The story goes that in November, 1966 many people of the town reported seeing a 7-foot tall, red-eyed, winged entity that caused all manner of upset and creepiness. The being hung around terrifying the hell out of everyone and making predictions which came true until Dec.1967, when a local bridge collapsed, killing 45 people.

A silly movie starring Richard Gere - who I'm sorry - looks like a gerbil - was made of it (The Mothman Prophecies) and gave the legend a new shot of life. After seeing a steady stream of the curious wanting to see the place the Otherworldy Mothman hung out, Wilson changed his mind about it being and outdated spooky story. The town held an annual Mothman Festival this year and erected a life-sized statue of Mothman on a downtown street.

"I don't care why they're coming, as long as they are," Wilson said. "If they want Mothman, then we'll give them Mothman."

EXTINCT ANIMAL, NOT
A mammal thought to be extinct has been found alive and well in Cuba. Called the Almiqui, the 19 inch, 24 ounce critter looks like a small anteater and does in fact eat insects and worms. The animal is nocturnal, burrowing underground during the day and that's why it's thought no one has seen the thing. The animal was described in 1861 and only 37 Almiqui have been seen, including this guy.

BIG EARS, BIG ______
The ears of Mr. Jeffries the Bassett Hound have made the Guiness Book of World Records as the largest dog ears in the world. They measure in at 11.5 inches 29.2cm) and are insured for $47,800.(30,000 pounds). Mr. Jeffries is the granddog of Biggles, the Hush Puppies Shoe spokesdog and lives in West Sussex, England with his owner, who is also a Mr. Jerrfries but has normal sized people ears.

MEN! A NEW EXCUSE TO STARE AT WOMEN'S BREASTS WHEN YOU TALK TO THEM
A new type of electronic paper has been developed by Philips Research, Netherlands which can show moving pictures or designs . By using low voltage charges that will scatter a thin layer of oil and water layer imbedded in the material, the paper can rapidly switch images and is being considered for clothing that can be worn as art or advertising
Researchers Robert Hayes and BJ Feenstra wrote, "The pictures are four times brighter than reflective liquid-crystal displays and twice as bright as other emerging technologies. The system works at low voltages, making it usable in a wide range of electro-optic devices. We may yet see wearable cinematic suits."

IT'S... ALIVE
Scientists at Cuza University in Romania have electrically charged Gas Blobs that behave as if they are alive. The plasma "cells" grow, replicate and communicate with each other, which is pretty much what biological cells do.

Most "experts" think living cells arose out of a complicated evolution of chemicals that took millions of years. But these guys created "life" by putting two electrodes into a chamber containing a low-temperature plasma of argon. A voltage high enough to simulate lightning created an arc of energy that flew across the gap between the electrodes. The Gas Blobs, which ranged in size from micrometers to three centimeters, formed spontaneously at the positively charged electrode. The spheres replicated by splitting into two, could increase in size by taking up neutral argon atoms and splitting them into ions and electrons and communicated by emitting electromagnetic energy, making the atoms within other spheres vibrate at a particular frequency. The scientists say this ought to change a few ideas about how life began on Earth. And I have no idea what I just typed...

UNKNOWN MOLLUSKS ATTACK STUPID PEOPLE
Hundreds of huge mollusks have begun appearing at Billings Dam in Sao Paulo, Brazil and so far no one has any idea what they are or where they came from. They weigh about a pound (half a kilo) each and authorities have been horrified to find out that locals are eating the things. However, Joana da Silva, who lives near the dam, said: "They taste like chicken, it is really good."

//-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=//\\-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=--\\
Perhaps this is an alien invasion, and the jokes on them! It must suck right now to be a
race of Clam-like looking beings. Since none of us speak Mollusk, I guess all the technology
they wanted to impart to us will be lost.
//-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=//\\-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=--\\

OLDEST SPIDER SILK FOUND
A piece of amber discovered in Lebanon contains the oldest known piece of spider silk which has been dated at 130 million years. The strand is 4mm long and is 90 million years older than the thread that previously held the record for the oldest preserved silk

NYET ON EURO SEX
The Moscow Committee for Advertising and Information has banned an ad that shows the Euro sign having sex with the US dollar sign, saying it was "obscene". I'm guessing because it shows full frontal nudity? Over 100 posters of this shocking display had to be torn down overnight after a letter was issued to the News Outdoor company. Magazine publisher Igor Maltsev said he had no idea the posters depicted anything inappropriate, saying, "I thought the currencies were dancing on our poster".

PENIS, THE OTHER WHITE MEAT
Sophie Matlala, 60, of South Africa sat down for her lunch break in the cafeteria of the hospital she works in to enjoy a bowl of goulash. Ms. Matlala said she took a couple of bites before "tackling the meat". The "meat" was slippery and she could not cut it with a knife, so she took it in her hand and placed it in her mouth. Even with this effort, the "meat" was so tough she couldn't bite through it. She then (you see where this is going..right?) took the meat out of her mouth and inspected it with her fellow co-workers, who all concluded that it was a penis. Because it had been cooked, they didn't know if it was human or an animal. (I'd like to stop at this point to ask what the hell is going on over there that they knew it was a penis. My friends wouldn't know what oh, a wombat or a rat penis looked like as compared to a human penis).

The discovery of the Goulash Genitalia was so traumatic for her that Sophie vomited for the rest of the afternoon and had to receive psychiatric help. She also added that she became a vegetarian overnight. Ms. Matlala tried to sue the hospital, saying they had a responsibility to their staff to serve penis-free lunches. Since the incident happened in 1999, the Pretoria High Court recently ruled that Ms. Matlala could no longer sue as she chewed the matter over too long and the statue of limitations ran out.

//-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=//\\-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=--\\
I was thinking that if this happened in Chicago, the woman would have taken it
out of her bowl, said, "Well this will teach him to keep his pants zipped" and
tossed it away. Perhaps we're too jaded here in the Big City?
//-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=//\\-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=--\\

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BABE
Japan's Kamato Hongo, the oldest person in the world, turned 116 in September. Mrs. Hongo says her secret is "Not moping around" and possibly the peculiar habit of sleeping 2 days, then remaining awake 2 days.

...LIKE I NEED ANOTHER HOLE IN THE HEAD...
Ron Hunt is one anomalous guy.

While working on his construction job in California, he fell off a ladder and as is the usual safety procedure, threw the drill he was working to the side. However, he fell head first onto the 18" drill he had been working with, skewering it through his skull. The drill bit went through his eye and out the back of his skull, pushing his brain aside and making Ron have a rather bad day. X-rays and the rest of the story in Odd PIcs 3

NEW M&M RECORD
A new world record has been set by Jim Hager, 47, of Oakland, California. Jim ate 115 M & M Candies, using chopsticks, in 3 minutes. I knew you'd want to know that.

FORGET THAT FLEA TRIVIA...
It's long been said that the humble flea held the insect record for the longest jump, going by body length-to-jump distance ratio. That record now belongs to the 6mm long Froghopper, AKA the Spittlebug. The reason for this name is because they sit on leaves and create a camouflage cover that, well, looks like a big, gooey, frothy white hocker known as Cuckoo Spit. (Hey, don't "ew" me...I'm just reporting here).

Professor Malcolm Burrows, who heads the zoology departmental at Cambridge University, said the secret of the magnificent jump lies in the insect's back legs which act like a "catapult", creating an explosive burst equal to about 13 feet (4,000 meters) per second per second. In Normal Person-Speak, that means the 6mm bug can jump about 28 feet (8.53 m).

ANOTHER DISNEY DEATH
Marcelo Torres, 22, was riding the Big Thunder Mountain Railroad when the roller coaster derailed inside a tunnel as it was climbing a steep grade. An "unknown, blunt object" caused "blunt force trauma" to his chest and fractured his ribs, leading to laceration of his lungs. Marcelo bled to death before help could arrive. Ten other passengers were injured.

IT SOUNDED GOOD AT THE TIME..
The West Japan Railway Company was having a problem with wild deer who would hang around the tracks, smoking and drinking, acting like morons and then would get creamed by trains as they stupidly wandered into tracks after saying, "Hold my beer and watch this!" (I want to talk to the guy who had to scrape deer off the front of the trains...). Authorities decided that they could use the deer's natural fear of lions (there many lions in Japan?) to scare them off and Lion Poop would do the job. A safari park supplied the dung, which was mixed with water and spread along a 1,320 ft. (402.3 m) stretch of track late last year (no, I want to talk to the guys who had to do that...).

It worked like a charm. Not one deer was hit but HOOOOO BOY did it stink. More than you could personally imagine. It was then decided this wasn't going to work out after all. Next idea: it's said deer have an aversion to the color white so sheets of white polystyrene will be draped along the tracks.

NEW ON THE SITE:

ODD PICS PAGE 3 - We're cooking now - a third page has been added to the collection so your load time isn't too long. Woohoo! Naughty Beans from Kellee ... Stupid Pet Tricks ... More! Wet! Pussy! ... Lions lyin' Around . . . A Whole Iceberg from Neil .. Rock SImulacra from Joey ... Space Shuttle Sonic Boom from someone whose name I lost ...one from The Stupid Files ...Terrorists Among The AMish ...CNN Banishes Countries Off the Earth ...Euro-Dollar Sex ... Ron Hunt's Holes In The Head ...What Lies Beneath from Chris ...

DEATH - A Barbecued Dead Guy ... When Terrorists Lose Their Heads from Razzell . .. Charming India Thug Art

SCIENCE - Ball Lightning Photo

ALIEN WRITING - Nushu, the Chinese Women's Secret Code

GHOSTS - World War 1 Phantom

HATE MAIL - more, of course ...

GUEST MAP ARCHIVES - more archiveded :)

I am going to put an "update" button on the front page and list things as I add them instead of waiting until I send out a newsletter to put it all up. That way I won't sit on stuff for 2 months when it's ready to go because I don't have time to do a newsletter. I'm also trying to redesign the front page so the whiners on Netscape who can't see layers well will stop whining. Did I say that out loud?

I'm still wading thru mail. Honest!

Thanks for being here!

I'm trying like hell not to put obnoxious ads on the site and insult both our intelligence. However, that's they way most generate $ to pay for the domain and expenses. If you'd like to support the site and help keep me supplied in coffee and help pay for the monster this site has turned into you can donate whatever you'd like through Amazon safely: http://www.amazon.com/paypage/P27EJ6Z3ODKENH (They take 15% but I can't bitch)
I have also put some books up on the site that I have used or read in making the site. If you click a link and buy it, or buy anything on Amazon but got there by clicking through the site, I get a tiny %. Every bit helps (and thank you! :)

 
Close. . . . . .

 

. . . . Back to Main page