#21......June 7, 2002

 


Hi Guys!

Long story short - I've been gone a few weeks and the site had problems. They're fixed. I'm back. Hi!

Longer story - I have some anomalous science news to report, first hand. I had a heinous experiment conducted on me by short alien doctors! (The fact that, at 5'10, most everyone is shorter than me, means nothing..so ignore that...I'm going for Drama here). Reason I was gone is, as some of you know, I have some health problems. One of them being horrible, and I mean off the scale, basically non-stop migraines. Well, they got worse which I didn't think was possible. So, this new Alien Neurologist I ended up at talked me into being an Earthling experiment by letting him inject me with Botox. Botox is a purified form of the Botulism bacteria, which kills people. Plastic surgeons have used it as a trendy Wrinkle Eraser because it paralyzes muscles when it's injected into them in small doses. In bigger doses it REALLY paralyzes muscles and stops them from spasming and also blocks pain transmissions. It's mostly used in last-ditch effort scenarios for people who, as the Alien MD told me, waving a tentacle, are "out of options and in uncontrollable pain." I was in such bad shape that if they had told me to drink Camel pee three times a day I would have done it, gladly, through a Bendy Straw; so what's a little poison? Bring it on, I sez. Let's do it.
In writing this up I went to this site http://headaches.about.com/library/weekly/aa073101a.htm?iam=excite_1&terms=botox to verify some facts I was remembering and they have a nice photo with Seven little dots drawn on a woman's face, showing the typical site of Botox injections for people suffering from severe migraines. I laffed right out loud at this.

If you're squeamish, skip this part and go to the "happy birthday " section.

I got the seven, alright. And about 30 more. In back of my ears. Along my eye sockets. Up my forehead, along the top of my head, down the back down the nape of my neck, in the hollow of the back on my skull, down the muscles along either side of the spine. In my jaw. And eyebrows. And side of my nose. And then I stopped paying attention. I heard things crunching when the needles went in. It hurt like hell. There were three of them. hovering over me, pointing and saying things like, "oot arg hoyt" to each other, and I knew they were just having fun at my expense. One of the shots made my arm twitch and I said hey, just like the frogs you dissect in in college hahahaha and they didn't laugh but I know they wanted to. They weren't kidding anyone. So, here I am, and I have a Deep Alien Secret to share with you - I know what this Botox is. What the secret is. You see - it still all hurts like hell. I am maybe half a notch better, even after all that. If I wasn't so damn stubborn I'd go to the ER right now and cry and wail and stop being so stoic and start all over again and beg someone to do something but you know what? This stuff is FUN. And the secret is..it keeps you occupied. My face is frozen, the experiment worked. Each hour brings a new discovery that distracts me from my pain. I have always taken great pride in the fact that I could raise one eyebrow at a time, like Spock, and now I can't. I drank out of a straw tonight and soda came shooting out my nose, because the whole bottom half of my chin doesn't swallow. This is fascinating! It still hurts! But I'm having too much fun to notice half the time! I recommend it, if you ever are faced with the decision.
The Botox fades in about 3 months. Don't know what happens after that. Camel Urine therapy, maybe. And you'll notice I did share the medical and scientific side of this with you, my dear readers, while sparing you the stuff like all the blood dripping in my eyes and running a 103 fever and them thinking they killed me. So *I* see it as all anomalous fun and WHAT luck that I have this site as a venue to share all this, huh? Hot damn, how things work out sometimes. :)

One more mention - Of all the new people who signed up for the newsletter in the last few weeks, ELEVEN of them are named Matthew. This is a bit over the Normal Matthew Percentage and I smell a conspiracy. I wanted to mention this publicly, just in case. If I 'out' this right at the beginning, it might thwart whatever Global/Alien/Take over/Conspiracy/New World Order plot might be brewing. I'm thinking of putting up a form and making them all register or something.

Happy Birthday to! : Shane~June 3.....Helen~June 6.....christa & Brian~ June 8....Ann~June 9.....Larry~June 10....Adrienne~June 12....Sandy~June 13....Michael & rees2n1-June 15....suri~June 16....Matt~June 17....george~June 18 ! (didn't send me your Bday when you signed up? Send it to me anytime!)
Extra Happy Birthday to Carla's Grandmom who is 97 on the 12th. You go, girl

Onward
NEW "IF IT'S IN WATER, THEY FOUND ONE" DISCOVERED OFF NZ COAST
New Zealand's National Institute of Water and Atmospheric Research (NIWA), along with American & Japanese scientists recently spent 22 days mapping more than 24,000 square kilometers of sea floor off New Zealand's northeast coast. It was well worth their time.
Images were built of more than 50 new volcanoes; 13 are more than 6 miles (10 km) in diameter. Seven of those volcanoes are active. The largest volcano of the area was more than 12 miles (20 km) in diameter and 1.5 miles (2.5 km) high. Also discovered are a new 'caldera' volcano that forms a hole in the sea floor 1,600 feet (500 m) deep.
Three new sets of underwater springs were discovered and new bacteria and animal species were discovered living around the vents. These Include a brand new bivalve and two new species of mussel.
Microbiologists brought up microbes found in the black smoker plumes and grew them at 158F (70 C) in laboratory conditions aboard the NIWA research ship.
"That's pretty incredible," said geomicrobiologist Dr Chris Daughney. "That's approaching the theoretical temperature limit of life."


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They never spent a summer in Chicago, I see...
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NZ CONTINUES TO KICK ASS, PART 2
The discovery of a 70-million-year-old marine reptile fossil found in New Zealand has been identified as a new species. The near-complete body of a previously unknown species of plesiosaur, a type of giant fast-swimming reptile, was embedded in rock on a North Otago beach, North of Dunedin..
It has been named Kaiwhekea Katiki by Otago University geology associate professor Ewan Fordyce and Arthur Cruickshank from Leicester Museums in the UK. The traditional plesiosaur had been described as "a snake threaded through the body of a turtle". This one was not so long in the neck and has different skull, teeth, eye and cheekbone proportions than the typically known species

PHONES AS THIN AS PAPER INVENTED
Soon you could be using your mobile phone as a book mark.
Stephen Forshaw has invented a wafer-thin phone stuck to paper that can be used to make one call. He sees the one-call phone as a kind of greeting card and the design won 1st prize in a competition sponsored by Sony.
Called the 'PS Call Me', the phone's electronics are in a computer chip thin enough to stick on a piece of paper and even mail. It works just like a regular phone. The recipient calls the sender by pressing a button on the "paper" phone. The sender would activate it to make sure it rang the right person. It will sell for about $14. (Which I think is about £10. I dunno. My head hurts and I'm too lazy to go look it up. I know it's 1,350.54 Icelandic Kronur, does that help?)


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You may recall the item from the last newsletter, "Cell Phones Allow Nagging From Afar".
Well, imagine the new heights a paper-postable-mailable phone will do for this sport. Oh I know,
I'm being my usual, cynical self. There's plenty of fuzzy warm pookie fluffy bunny mookie
snuggums huggy wuzzy wubby crap this new paper phone can be used for. They want you to
envision the young, smitten lad placing one under the window wiper of the young Lass' car with a
little "call me, I miss you" note attached, showing her love-drenched smile when she reads the note,
teeth gleaming perfect in the sun. Hearts and flowers and sentiment. That kind of stuff. PUH-lease.
What opportunities the paper phone will open up is: people like me, getting about a dozen and
planting them into the magazines of my downstairs neighbor over the course of a week as they're left
in the hallway by the mailman. When I know the neighbor has about 10 of the paper phones tucked
away in 10 magazines strewn all over his apartment, I wait till 3am on a Sunday morning when I'm
sure the hangover he's nursing is just about fading enough to let him drift off to sleep, and start calling.
Phone # 1 rings as I sit upstairs admiring the wafer thin technology of the , sipping my coffee, listening
to the "PS Call Me"
and hear the crashing of furniture below as he stumbles around in the dark, the
swearing, the banging of toes and knees, trying to find out WTF is ringing at 3 am, seemingly out
of nowhere. He finds it, yet it's just a piece of paper. How can that be? I wait 20 minutes, and call on
Phone #2, listening to it ring for 30 minutes while he tries to figure out what drawer that Playboy
is stashed in. By Phone #9, he's got the idea. His nerves are shot. He's afraid to close his eyes, lest
the next bell goes off, a Pavlovian terror by this point. When the last phone does ring, on that paper I'll
have penned a (tender) note which will read, "Remember when you pinched my ass in the hallway
in front of my mom and said, "call me sometime, we'll have fun? Well, I am. Thanks!'".
Ah, technology.

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THAI GUY INVENTS NEW MENTAL ILLNESS DEFENSE
A Thai man was arrested for setting fire to cars and explained it his actions by saying that the sound of emergency vehicle sirens sent him into a sexual frenzy. After setting vehicles on fire, he'd go buy a beer, call police, hang around to watch the flashing lights and sirens of the emergency vehicles as they arrived and have an orgasm. He helpfully added that doing all this relieved the stress of his every day life..
Police discovered that he had been previously jailed for two years on similar charges and after his release got a job as volunteer fireman. Doctors said he needs help.

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Ya think?!
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From RRougeMan:
Winners of the "I look like my dog" contest http://www.acsu.buffalo.edu/%7Ejwc/winners.html
They're hilariously perfect.

From Mom:
Incredibly detailed antique, panoramic view, hand-drawn pen & Ink drafted maps of America and Canada for download or purchase - by state or territory - from the mid 1800s to 1900s. That's how they did it back then...now it's fine art
http://lcweb2.loc.gov/ammem/pmhtml/panhome.html

'TECHNO-PAINT' CAN CHANGE COLOR
A Dutch team has developed spray-on liquid crystal 'paint' which changes color at the touch of a button and could be used to make giant TV screens, digital billboards and walls.

Current liquid crystal displays need to be sandwiched between two plates of glass, limiting their size and making them fragile. The paint is more versatile as it can be sprayed on to a single glass sheet.
Prototypes are being developed that will work on plastic and fabric might be next. This could cut down the weight of laptop computers and even be used for wall-sized LCD "artworks" and LCDs on surfaces that are not flat.

DEVOUT CATHOLICS MORE PRONE TO OCD
A new study claims devout Catholics are more likely to suffer from obsessive-compulsive disorders. The study compared nuns, priests and those who listed themselves as "devout Catholics" with against those with virtually no religious involvement or people who siad they were 'religious' but didn't consider themselves devout.
Volunteers were asked to list symptoms like intrusive mental images, worries, feelings of self worth and how well they felt they were personally adapting their life according to their religion's guidelines.
Researchers from the University of Parma in Italy found the more devout Catholics reported the more severe symptoms, but that this may only show that people that already were prone to having those character traits feel more drawn to religion and devote themselves to God as a way of trying to cope with them..
Lynne Drummond, a psychiatrist at St George's Hospital, London, says many OCD patients say they had a strict upbringing where actions were either right or wrong with no gray areas.

425 MILLION-YEAR-OLD DNA SAMPLE FOUND
A British scientist has discovered the oldest sample of DNA known to man, a 425 million-year-old micro-organism found in salt in a remote part of Michigan. It's 4,000 times older than the previous record holder which was taken from a frozen mammoth
The minute samples of the ancient sea is 11 to 425 million years old and shows evidence of different populations of micro-organisms in salt layers of different ages. Until now DNA was thought to be able to survive for only tens of thousands of years.

GEOGRAPHY IS MAKING VILLAGERS DEAF
Romanian doctors said the entire population of a mountain village has hearing problems and they have no idea why; other than the fact they live there. Doctors from Sibiu County Hospital say 800 people in Copsa Mica have reported having trouble hearing amd many have gone completely deaf . Specialists say it may be due to air streams and pressures caused by the village's location in a depression of the Carpathian mountains.

LOST INCA CITY DISCOVERED
An expedition co-led by Hugh Thomson of Britain's Royal Geographical Society and American archeologist Gary Ziegler have discovered the ruins of a lost settlement about 30 miles (50 km) southwest of the famous ruins of Machu Picchu, in the Peruvian Andes. Named Cota Coca, the city is said to be in a "remarkable state of preservation" and located in an extremely remote area hidden at the bottom of a near-inaccessible river canyon in dense jungle. They said it was "quite something getting there". They began looking for the site after a tip from a mule-handler.
The ruins include about 30 stone buildings which were constructed around a central plaza. One building being over 65 ft (20 m) long.

CHAIR, POSSIBLY SEEKING SEXUAL SATISFACTION, SETS ITSELF ON FIRE
Australian firefighters have no idea why a 92-year-old woman's rocking chair caught fire or why it was the only item burnt in the fire at her home in Victoria. The woman doesn't smoke or use candles and there were no electrical appliances near the chair. The woman was treated for smoke inhalation.

1,500-YEAR-OLD GLASS BOWL UNCOVERED INTACT IN NEW FOREST*
Excavators at a New Forest Anglo-Saxon burial ground have stumbled on a rare glass bowl that remained intact for more than 1,500 years.
Archaeologists say the relic is in such good condition because it has been hidden inside a wooden bucket in the Hampshire forest. The bowl measures 5in across and 1.5in high. The pale green bowl, dating from the late fifth or early sixth century, was part of a grave site that contained several skeletons and other trinkets, including ornate buckles and spearheads.

WHY WE NEED UPDATES IN THIS I'LL NEVER KNOW
The world's next would-be space tourist, Lance Bass of boy band 'N Sync, said Friday that leading Russian space doctors had cleared him for a flight to the International Space Station aboard a Russian rocket, a journey he hopes to make this fall between tours.


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If they can send one over-rated, annoying Boy Band mannequin into space, why not all of them?
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NEW ON THE SITE:
The new stuff up last newsletter (Bill Watson's Sky Rods for example) and the few new Odd Pics (which are on Odd Pics 2 now) that were not linked these last weeks are working now. Not that I'm implying someone didn't link them up to begin with. Like, oh, say someone who is actually just starting college and taking programming classes and was entrusted to upload about 33 hours of my hard coding and graphic work. Said uploading being a no-brainer task that would have taken all of say, 7 minutes, while I attended to personal matters of great import. And say, just for pretend, that when questioned on the ability to be able to handle the task at hand, knowing the uploaded content would be the very stuff people would be wanting to look at, specifically, because it would be on the front page of the site with a big "NEW!" tag by it, the College Boy incredulously and snippily retorted that "even a ******* moron" could "put some stuff up and check mail for 2 weeks" and even mocked the person, let's pretend it was say - me making the query - for being a "ball-busting bitch". Just say, for instance. Not like that's what HAPPENED; I'm just sayin'.
As an addendum, I will read my mail ASAP. It seems they don't teach the "Open>Check New Mail>Read" process in college, either. Ah, to be 17 again.
Jesen's letter of apology to me here http://www.anomalies-unlimited.com/Jesen.html
I told him if, with his great web skills, he can hack the site and take it down before anyone reads this, then he can take it down. It'll be there. Hahahah!

SCIENCE: A weird postcard from early 20th century France celebrating X-Ray beach.........the world's first computer (only two rooms).........and of course, the naked chicken and an opinion 'quizlet' to vote if you think the whole thing is 'sick' or 'science'.

ODD PICS: I broke the Odd Pics page apart and Odd Pics 2. It was getting kind of long-ish and long to load. Since it's my favorite section and there's more on the way I figured I'd break it into parts while it's early. Page One will load faster now all new "adds" will be put on Odd Pics 2 if you wants to update your bookmarks.
SO.....Up New - The creepy face mask that passed for high tech plastic surgery back in 1908.......A pic of a ghoslty deep-sea anglerfish ....An X-Ray of a vibrator somewhere unmentionable....Antique Pen & Ink drawings of some bats. Very bizarre looking bats, and very cool drawings.

ARCHEOLOGY: the 1,500 year old glass bowl mentioned above - the bubbles and flaws in the glass are gorgeous ....A bad archeology joke I know. You have to draw it and tell it, so I put it up. And all for free! What a deal! :)

That's it for now....more much sooner~ thanks for reading and visiting!
Rahni <--- Your Botoxed Blonde Web-babe
<Mail Me> <-- mail, mail about how I never read my mail, pics, comments , nosy personal questions
www.anomalies-unlimited.com < -- just a hobby, honest
to unsubscribe or subscribe: Newsletter.html


You know how your mom used to say, "It can't be everyone but you?!"
Yes it can.


 


 

 
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